Say yes to the...

So this weekend I went down to Maryland to celebrate one of my best friend's baby shower.

In good-ole Leni fashion, I decided that the weekend couldn't be all about her, and Saturday we would go try on wedding dresses.

She's an only child too - so she KINDA got it.

So I decided to start my wedding dress experience at David's Bridal because
1. They carry plus size dresses
2. They have plus size dressed for $99
3. I got a credit card that comes with financing for 0% so IF the $99 dollar dresses didn't work out, I had other options.
4.  I wanted to start from the bottom and work my way up.

So, I won't lie there was a bit of excitement as the day came for me to go try on dresses with my 2 best friends.... Nikki brought blue Champagne ( hidden by her big ass preggo belly) and I remembered to bring my spanx.  I figured it would be a day of these 2 things mixed together:

Well..... let's just say it ..............Wasn't

We get there, and they assume Emily is the bride--- which COOL i really didn't wanna talk to them so I stood awkwardly in the back until paperwork had to be completed.

They last second changed our consultant once they knew it was me to...... Chardonnay.. the only black consultant.....

Exactly.

So whatever, the girl who checked us in ( Jordan-- she was the devil) was super dismissive and rude, so while we waited we grabbed dresses from the clearance rack in my size and waited....and waited.....and waited.....

Then Chardonnay appeared and said we could give it a shot.

Tried on a few of the dresses we got from the rack, and they were... alright-- but we really wanted to see some of the dresses I listed, AND called the store about to ensure they would have in.

So here are some of the examples of the plus size dresses I got to try on.....

So THIS shit was fist of all too small.
but also, what in the actual fuck is the high-water business going on by my legs.
Fucking TERRIBLE

Then there was this shit.

I really am not into strapless cause I got tig ole' bitties but I figured I would try everything on that I could.

The top actually was pretty nice, and the fabric on the waste wrapped diagonally which was slimming.

The bottom tho was some BULLSHIT.

 And stupid me, thought that my consultant would close the dress / use clips to help the bride to be who is about to drop CASH and see how the bodice would fit.

Chardonnay wasn't interested in giving me service so -- every dress I tried on I wasn't able to see a shape.

COOL CHARDONNAY, REAL COOL.

But then, I got to try on this magical size 20 dress. Emily and I's faces say it all.



















WHAT. THE. FUCK.

That shit was tight as fuck. I gave up mid try-on cause this was hilarious. We told them, nothing 20 and under.......

Then there was this dress... you know how I said before I liked how the fabric went diagonally across my tummy. Que this dress that screams, hey fatty, wanna feel worse try me on:

Finally I got to try on this dress. I was hesitant. but.... i actually felt like a bride-ish. The top wasn't what dreams were made of, but the bottom was what I pictured.

So I did some testing.

First I did some kicking...

Then I realized--- maybe this can be fun?!

Then I twirled

And I felt like Kenya Moore"Gone with the Wind Fabulous!"

SO I started to feel ballsy, and asked if she could check to see if they had my favorite dress in my size....

and they brought me a size 16....

In the many faces of Nene Leeks, may I present my response:

I was done. They paid no attention to us, my friends had to help me in and out of the dresses, and look for them, and very little offer for assistance.

Just because I am fat, doesn't mean I don't deserve a great experience. So we left.

And in good ole fashion my fat ass got the fattest meal on the menu and called it a day - cause I have amazing coping skills LOL.

So my next dress appointment will be somewhere that caters to Curvy Brides cause I can't do that shit again LOL.

Till next time..